Christmas in One Word

Christmas this year in a word was hard.
Said Child 3, “it feels like it never really happened, because what we were all waiting for did not happen.”
This is because the man-child, who is now really a man, but will always be my child, he had a work emergency, that became a ‘all hands on deck’ kind of emergency, and that meant all vacation plans were canceled.  He had, if you remember, moved off to the big city, bright lights and all.  He does some sort of computer work.  I cannot tell you exactly, and that is only because I don’t exactly know what he does.  Just computer-something…  I know he travels around for his work, to places like Paris in the spring (for 3 weeks) and that his job is important.  Anyway, way back in June he went in to ask for time off, knowing that he was low man on the totem pole, he went in asking for Christmas week off.  Christmas is his favorite holiday, everything from the familiar movies, tot he belly dancers on the city parade.  So for him to plan ahead from June to Christmas, is not surprising.
He had a work emergency, which was bigger than we imagined, he spent the entire week of planned vacation time working.  Our hearts were crushed, we held out hope even to the last minutes of Christmas eve.  We broke the sad news to our kids, who all were heartbroken.  We reminded them that this was God’s plan, and not our own, and that we can be sad, and cry, and that it was okay, to feel these emotions.  I put up a quote from Desiring God on my Facebook page,  “Tears are not the enemy. Tears do not reflect a lack of faith. Tears are a gift from God that help to wash away the deep pain of loss.”- Desiring God  I hope I guided my children through the time of brokenheartedness, in a loving and trusting way.  Sadness comes for a moment but Joy comes again in the morning, grief and sadness are all part of what makes us human, unique and in God’s image, we can embrace them not hide them or squelch the emotions we are feeling.  We pushed on with our Christmas plans, we had some face time with the man-child, and we were able to see him for a minute, not hug or hold him, but to see him.  I think if we had known from the beginning we would have been prepared for this. The surprise left us so unprepared, raw and unprotected from the grief.  So this Christmas held joys and cheers and happiness, but it was hard.
Very Hard.

God is good, and faithful, and we celebrated that!  Go hug your kids, they need your love
jen

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s